Angels

From unsent letter to Brian, 1992

I'm doing better since my appointment Tuesday.  Gina says I'm doing wonderful with everything.  I'm still afraid of going to sleep at night but I know that will go away.  I don't think he has enough guts to come here, and if he did, it wouldn't be a very good idea on his part.

I hope this letter wasn't too depressing.  But you really should know what to expect, and I'll keep you posted.  Thank you for believing me and for all of your support!  It means a lot.

Scissors

Diary entry, June 9, 2013

Nothing changes.  Ever.

But we like the house.  And there is an okay dog walk not too far away.  So maybe not as big of a disaster as it first appeared.  Maybe.

Last week you got lucky, little girl.  Don’t you dare think you can be lucky again.

Diary entry, October 31, 1983

This week’s saying:  Being alone is an art—you have to learn to make the most of it.

Waiting

“Hold fast to dreams,
For if dreams die
Life is a broken-winged bird,
That cannot fly.” 
― Langston Hughes

River, 1999

This is what I know.

That a window left open when
even the trees shiver with premonition of
sorrowful weather,
it will suppress you.
It will make you wish you had noticed,
make you wish that you had been warned.
You will close your eyes a thousand
times, feel the groove of the wood against
the palms of your hands,
hear the decisive thud that assured you of
closure. 
Until the pang of knowledge forces the
window betrayed again.
And, when you burst through the kitchen door,
find the papers curling at the edges,
a river of consequences running across
the floor,
you will wish you had never pretended.