The promise

I did not run
but I wanted to
I did not expect
only found a way to hope
I did not demand
just made my pleas in secret
I did not call this my last chance
though I knew it to be so
I did not admit defeat
as I held onto tendrils
I might still be bleeding
yet for tomorrow I will fight
as I come flying out of my hole
with all guns
blazing

The Gordian knot

Whisper it to me while no one is listening

tell me I am a fool

tell me I am not

tell me something that makes sense

and then prove it

The Reckoning

     “I like your t-shirt,” I told her.

     The girl smiled at me.  It was a relief to realize she couldn't quite talk yet.  But when she gave me a little wave and turned to go with the dogs, I knew what she was saying.  She would be seeing me again soon.

Waves

It was not the water I feared but
the coming
down
the expelling of the clouds from
my lungs
I was not alone but I could
feel the earth
tearing

Imitation of life

This one last time                    come along with me                you run so slow I lost you centuries ago                     now is not where you said you would be               leaving me alone and out of breath                    this breakdown in the making                        where are you love      where are you sleeping            I am awake I am all aware      that I am here and you are there                         you do not belong to me         you do not belong to me

Whose truth will be accepted             as war rages against my memories                  I cannot say for certain what I expected          or even what I thought I believed      but I am jumping off the cliff into this pillow of air              while you are a voice warning me from the canyon floor                   because this is where you disappear               and where I wish for something more

Final moments

          “Let’s play a game."

          “Let’s," Megan returned, because Alturis wanted her to say no.  She refused to do anything he wanted her to, at least within reason.  If she had to die, it wasn't just going to be on his terms.

         “We’ll ask each other questions," he said.

         “Great.”

         “I’ll start."  Alturis set the gun on the table, as if daring her to reach for it.  When she just looked at him, he leaned forward, his eyes glittering with amusement.  “So tell me, Megan Cooper," he purred.  "What part of yourself would you most like to kill?”

         Megan had the feeling Alturis asked all of his victims this before he murdered them.  A part of her wanted to reply "athlete's foot," or "gonorrhoea," just to show him she wasn't afraid.  Instead she answered honestly, “My memory.”

         Alturis frowned and tut-tutted, like a teacher disappointed with his pupil.  “That would be too bad,” he said.  “Your memory is the only thing in life you own.”

         "If you want it, it's yours," Megan retorted.  "My turn now to ask you a question."

         He made a slight bow.

         "What's it like being a psychopath?"

         Alturis stared at her for a long, fraught moment.  His hand twitched over the gun before he burst out laughing.

Goodbye to all this

do you see where eternity ends
did you know that you were my friend
this planet a box that holds me