Tomorrow is Crying for You

Something could break

every word you 

spoke

make you sound like 

you were choking

as you danced that 

frantic ballet 

suspended midair

kicking at nothing 

when the floor had

bottomed out years 

before

I could never save you

I couldn't even love you

but how I tried

how I tried

Blinded

And if I raise my arms
and try to fly
only the sun will be
out of my reach 
when the sun is
all I desire.
For a century, at least,
I have stood here
with my arms clasped
to my side
waiting for the dew to share
its secrets with me.
For a century, at least,
I have stood here and
waited
my palms facing 
the sky
my eyes turned toward
the sun.

A Study in Drowning

When I throw back
my head to
open my mouth
the water chokes me
the salt
blinds me

And the sounds, and the
crash, and the
rage of the flashing
waters
silence my
screaming

But you know I
will float for you
You know I 
will face the 
sky 
for you

Not Theirs but Mine

Listen

the trees are telling a

story of their 

silence

when we knew right from wrong

this is where it will all

begin again

the battle for life

Illusions

I come from the winter people.

They sent me to this sometimes green and hot place for learning.  I thought it was an honor.  I thought it would make me rich with experience.

Since then, at least ten, maybe twenty times a day I have begged for ignorance.   This is wealth with no place to spend it.

"We will wait for you," they told me.  "We will feel every moment of your progress."  I made them swear it.

Yet even with awareness of their presence my loneliness aches so deeply that I am convinced it is burying me.  I want to go home.  But home will not have me.  Not yet.  Not when it is clear even to me that, although fatigued and battle-scarred, I am still standing.  And not until I know all that is killing these sometimes green and hot-weathered people.

Far Away

I shivered

walked past the knives 

and lived to be stabbed

a thousand more times

What Cries in the Night

I remember them now
the dark plastic green with ridges  
the etched circles in the base that
scratched my hand 
held the dandelions I brought home
for you
the fortune laying on your bed 
it was an accident it was an accident
I never had a chance
it was an accident
I remember.