Judgment

I have considered you as
I watch the creeping
mold overtake the
paint on the
walls.
As the dampness of an
unventilated room drowns
each molecule of
air.
And I wonder which inevitability
chased my belief in you 
away.
But whatever took me down the
other road--
it becomes simply another 
irrelevant
better left unknown.

And just when I thought I had made
myself old over wishing for 
something to whisper like a
kind stranger into 
my ear,
I understand, and I do not
blame you
I find myself catching the edge of
every movement of atmosphere even
the leaves have forgotten,
listening
waiting...

The Impossible Dream

tell the boy with the red straws 

I am not coming back

take care of the dogs

the cats and the
pirate kids

this dark edifice 

locked doors and

stone hallways

courtyards and windows and 

signs with directions
the network is broken
so is our ending

morning was lost

the dolls with knives took it

now all I want is the
afternoon

please

The Black Hole

Just around the corner

you can be singing

in awe of the clouds forming

or the ants running

And then you will see nothing else 

You will wonder why you 

never saw it coming

Blowing the Whistle

This is not the person I 

wanted to be

this is not where I 

wanted to live

these are not the memories I 

wanted to decorate my

hallway with

Deluge

I see a man
on the top of a hill 
underneath a tree
I turn to face him
we stand there for a while
the grass is green from the rain
he does not know my name
I open my mouth and nothing gags
he listens
I turn to run I run run run
down the slope my arms stretched wide
I dive between the tall grass
the grass is tall from the rain
he calls for the daydreamer but 
I am gone
I am back in my bed
hating myself for the telling
it is too late
he does not know my name but 
he knows
there is no turning back

The Tomorrow that Never Came

I found your horses running scared
with apocalyptic thoughts and
moonlit hair
this is the dream you gave to me
tonight

I want to learn to cry once more
I wonder if I even could before
I reach to enthral your sky

But we are exposed along the line
nothing left to soothe our sunburned eyes
No notice of what still hides
and if we must wait for it alone

Because this is the dream we found tonight
this is not the dream I held inside
Gone and vapour undoing our glue

As I remember how you

found my horses running scared

shivering in the wind with

frozen hair

it broke to the touch

as you whispered goodbye goodbye

goodbye...

Pieces

Let me tell you what I know about

my broken heart

this is the rhythm of it falling apart

toss the stones in the river because

we are

we are coming up for air again

What did I even know about

guilt and sin

all of the dreams that

I was dying in

it was a curse it was a blessing it

was utter nothingness

until it skidded and came crashing

home

No telling how the earth will

record this disaster

whistling dixie in the wind

as if I had the answer

            ballet with fractured form

tripped up by vengeful rapture

the hammer flung against

the wall

Dismantled piece by piece into

a million parts

buried back with Santa at

the Christmas tree farm

what is dead is what is real to

the falling apart

we heard the siren but not the

alarm

I wonder how I will know when

the sky becomes my master

when dreams of yesterday stop

mocking me with laughter

tomorrow is today tornadoes

circling my trailer

I was wrong over

and over again

Now I whisper to the wind about

my broken heart

to unravel in slow motion

not a subtle art

toss the stones in the river because

I am

I am here alone at the end