Brutalized by
hope
and expectations
where have I been?
What I thought was a beginning
was the beginning of my
end
Chicago/February, 1980
What do I remember about that day?
Julia crying in the kitchen. Alex hiding
upstairs.
A tall, dark-haired man in Julia’s living room.
Telling me, I’m your brother. You’re going to live with me now.
My own terror.
But when he smiled and held out his hand, all I knew was love.
I can’t climb out
the spiders in my wrists
stretch into my fingers
only a balled fist stops them
no one hears the clicking
but me
I had no idea she said
nothing whispered through the water
just metal scraping
scratching disguised as
luck